The Choices We Make 2

Hello Diary,

Now you would agree with me that I am pretty much psychotic, but I wasn’t always like this. Love made me this way, really do I blame love? I believe Bode made me this way and I gave my word that I would deal with him in every way possible. I would make him regret the day he decided to break every bit of my heart. You might really think I am taking things too far but if we would be honest with ourselves I am not entirely at fault. Bode has some faults too and I would explain the whole truth on this day. Stella and I attended the same school which was where we met, Bode and I or rather where Bode met with me for the first time and to be honest, that day is one I would never forget. It all happened so fast, memories of it fly so quick in my mind but I would explain every bit of it as much as I can. So let’s begin.

It was a Thursday evening at around that time the sun decides to set but not without all of my emotions as they decided to fail me on that day and allow tears trickle-down my face. It hurt so much that my own so called friend would borrow all the money I had on me on that day and when it was time to return it, she was nowhere to be found. We had agreed that she would meet me at exactly 6pm in a classroom just right next to the same place we always eat every time, but it was 6:30pm and she was yet to show. I had no call card on my phone, neither was I with any extra money. Just then there he was, looking straight at my broken self as I wondered how I was going to get home. She was my only friend, I wasn’t the out spoken one neither was I the beautiful or the busty one. Guys never even gave me a second look, not even my parents sometimes I felt invisible and I felt I could stand in front of a wall and still the wall wouldn’t notice me. Well you get the picture, so now you see how surprised I was when I caught him staring at me as if he knew me, as if he could relate. I had never seen him before but there he was staring at me with those powerful brown eyes and with a smile that melted my heart, for a minute I thought I was dreaming so I gently pinched myself and there I was. IT WAS REAL!!!

He spoke his first words and they gave me just the right amount of comfort I needed. Then i began confessing to him as if I was snitching on a friend to a police man. I hated the fact that he had that much effect on me but I couldn’t help myself and just like that he saved me on that day and said those reassuring words to me, ‘’I will never leave you’’. From that day on, like a sheep led to slaughter, I followed him and did exactly what he asked. I slept on his words, I read his messages over and over again, I replayed every moment spent together in my head and every night I would say to him, ‘’I would always love you’’ and he would say the same. So what happened?

I have to go now diary, now that I remember everything, it’s worse because part of me wants him dead but the other part of me wants him back in bed with me. I guess I would just have both, our story would be like Jack and Rose in titanic and so will it be till the end. We would die together like Romeo and Juliet and our story shall be forever told. I have to go now but tomorrow is another day.

Goodnight Diary

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