I am tired of it all.
I am tired of sleepless nights
Worrying about my baby's health
Where she could be now
What deed is being done on her now......
I am at fault
I told her to go right ahead
I wanted our house to be as majestic
And I believed when I was told
That nothing gets a family out of poverty faster
Than a daughter with a white boyfriend.
Now my daughter
My flesh and blood
Is the star in hideous acts
Is the participant in horrendous fetishes
All so she can bring home something
I am too proud to say sorry
Because my upbringing taught me
That the parent is always right
And you, the child, are always wrong
I can never apologise
Because I don't have the strength to
I was never taught how to
How important to
I can only hang my head in shame
Knowing all the things you do
To bring home something
Is all thanks to my guidance
I am to blame
For the horrors you've participated in
You are free to turn your back on me
Because I provoked you into this
You are free to no longer respect me
How can you,
After all you've done
To get me out of poverty?
How can you,
When all I've done
Is think about my happiness,
Is talk about me,
Is put myself first,
Yet you're my responsibility?
Usinisamehe, mtoto wangu
Don't forgive me,
Don't show remorse,
Walk away and turn your back,
I deserve no forgiveness
I deserve to die alone
I deserve to be disowned
Paying for the sin of not taking the responsibility
That is you, my baby.
Khadijah's mother stepped outside, tears freely flowing down her cheeks.
Her husband was lying on the veranda, still clutching an alcohol bottle. His pocket was sticking out, revealing a tiny fragment of a fifty dollar bill.
She looked at him, then took a few steps to a nearby tree.
She looked up at it, having very robust branches, and threw a rope around one branch, tying it firmly.
With surprising agility she managed to climb up one branch, then stood up, her weight being supported by the robust tree branch.
She hesitated, looking behind at the small homestead, then, still crying, slipped the rope around her neck.
Don't forgive me, my child.
Then she jumped from the tree branch.
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